Rocky Hormuz

Animation by CHUNK. With apologies to the Beatles.

~~~

Now somewhere in the Persian Gulf between Muscat and Dubai
There’s a place called the Strait of Hormuz
And all day, the oil tankers sail right by
Iran without having to comply.
And Donald didn’t like that.
He said, something about uranium and two weeks
So one day, he said he’d back a plan
Of Bibi Netanyahu’s.

And now through Hormuz
Ships no longer cruise
Without tributing the Ayatollah.
Donald, the fool,
Blew up a girls’ school,
And now we might die of ebola.

There was no way out
He’d lost in a rout.
Because he had listened to Hegseth.
Hegseth was a punk, and drunk as a skunk,
And jokers online called him Kegsbreath.

He sent Slenderman
To talk to Iran
And enter in negotiations.
To Kush and Wykoff,
Iran said, “Fuck off,”
And prices rose at the gas stations.

But Donald was hot,
Cuz he’d screwed up a lot.
And Hormuz might stay closed forever.
Aaah!
Dumb dumb Donnie dumb
Dumb dumb Donnie dumb
Dumb dumb Donnie is so god damn dumb.